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Once upon a time, there lived a single pretty girl named Sarah. She had been single for so long that she had forgotten what it was like to be in a relationship.
One day, Sarah decided to try online dating. She created a profile and started swiping left and right. After a few days, she matched with a guy named John.
They started chatting and hit it off immediately. They decided to meet up for a date at a fancy restaurant.
Sarah arrived at the restaurant and saw John waiting for her. He looked nothing like his profile picture. He was shorter, bald, and had a beer belly.
Sarah was disappointed but decided to give him a chance. They sat down and ordered their food. As they were eating, John suddenly burped loudly.
Sarah was embarrassed and tried to ignore it. But then John farted loudly.
Sarah couldn't take it anymore and excused herself to go to the bathroom. She called her friend and told her what had happened.
Her friend laughed and said, "Well, at least you know he's not the one!"
Sarah agreed and decided to end the date early. She thanked John for the meal and left.As she walked home, she couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation. She realized that being single wasn't so bad after all.

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Drugs and friends

Dan was a neighbor, he went for a party last week and the story is about to be told.

Dan was a young boy trying to survive, people always saw him as a hard working person but Dan kept bad friends, he was either seen gambling with touts sometimes or clubbing whenever he was done working.

Just last week, he was arrested.
Police came late evening and dragged him away.
We never heard the real gist yo to the reason why he was arrested until two days later.

In the usual restaurant where Dan clubbed, his friends ridiculed him and claimed he wasn't smart and that was arrested.
The story holds that Dan had made out with lady at the party but had no money to pay because he was drunk at first.

Now Dan's image is totally ruined, he can't even keep his head up while he walked. His friends deserted him. His friends are said to be more responsible than him.

Keep good company.

Category Competition Winner!

Prize successfully withdrawn to @kingsleysom's wallet
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Something I experienced yesterday that didn't support the saying "a patient dog eat the fattest bone".
I took some children for a children and ladies program, the traffic was so much on our way to the extend we were all hungry the extra money I took I couldn't use it because our transport got short on the way I had to add my money.
We got there safely after the program the children were asked to go and collect their lunch while the ladies continue with their program.
I was so hungry so I asked one of the children to tell the person in charge of the food to give me because the person is someone I know. The lady by my side said I should wait that after d ladies program we will have others I told her I can't wait the time was already 2pm before we finish it will be around 6pm and we left home from 8am.
So after I finished eating the program continued until later in the evening after the program everyone was expecting something but to our surprise nothing was given.
Lol then I concluded a patient dog isn't always lucky.
Pls like and comment

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I attended a wedding this month, an unprecedented union between an famous Area boy and God fearing church girl.

You see its unprecedented because it was those kind of weddings that would normally surprise neighbours and well wishers because these two had little in common at least to the eyes of unlookers.

They were a beautiful couple and before the traditional marriage the groom made sure to make everyone happy so that everything would go smoothly.

You and I know that village people are hard to please😆.

On the traditional ceremony all went fine and well until it was time to share food. Man was a notable person in his home base and made sure to bring all his friends.

More than 50% of them were not entertained properly as many were not given anything to drink or eat. It was total chaos. This would not have happened if the huge sum of money given by the groom was utilized properly, but so the thing goes.

After much deliberation they agreed to serve their guest separately during the reception of the White wedding.

After their marriage that fateful day, the reception began with dancing, and much celebration, you should have seen me that day,

I had eye's for 😘 somebody's daughter. As one of groomsmen i made sure to exhaust all the dancing step I had been dancing secretly since and occasionally turned my neck to see if she was watching me perform. And as the dance was coming to an end I walked gently with my hand folded on my chest to toast this fine gurl in the crowd.

Me; Hello beautiful, Can i have this dance with you. She hesitated, "I will go easy on you" I affirmed.

Her friends were cheering her on.

She was blushing uncontrollably when she replied " I have a boyfriend"

Me: That's fine, we'll look for another girlfriend for him cause what you need now is a husband.

My hand was stretched towards her the whole time. She was about to take my hand when I heard "Kpaa... Kpa... Kpaaaa...".

It was one of those rare moments when a perfectly going wedding turned into sheer disaster.

Mehn, just when I was about to have one of the best moments of my life, the whole auditorium went from a lovely party 🥳 to a place of total pandemonium.

The groom's family had exhausted the food needed to take care of their invited guest. The groom's mother had approached the bride to ask for little assistance in food and drinks to help cater for those left in the hall but she declined saying many of her friends are on the way coming and some guest from the village are waiting at home for the food her mother kept aside.

The groom's mother paid deaf ear's to her, went to where the food was kept and started sharing to her guest.

The bride on noticing this left her husband and went to accost the groom's mother who gave her that resounding slap, Kpaa..... that rendered me single till date😣.

The bride returned the slap on its arrival, this time her own slap felt like it came from both hands but it was just her left hand swinging in the hair.

Some good Samaritan had stopped the slapping wrestling from having a round 2 when the husband walked boldly to where the wife was standing and gave her a resounding slap for hitting his mother.

At the end of the Slapping SMACKDOWN, I look everywhere for my soon to be bride but she was nowhere to be found.

I guess she moved outta the hall like everyone else as the party came to a close abruptly.

Now who should I blame for my misfortune, THE GROOM, THE BRIDE or THE GROOM'S MOTHER.

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ALL Funny/Hilarious Relationship Life Hack Family Public Awareness Happy Ending Backfire/Gone-wrong Injustice Quarrel/Dispute Spiritual/Paranormal Confession Dangerous/Tense/Insecurity Uncategorized
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