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A day I will never forget

A day I will never forget
It was one Thursday morning during the COVID-19 era.l was outside with a group of people who stayed at home,we were playing ludo near a woman who was selling bread .the owner of the bread was busy prizing yam.
All of a sudden a boy zoomed🏃🏃🏃 passed us and a man in military uniform was giving him a hot chase,he was shouting catch that boy catch that boy then he cracked his gun.lo and behold the old woman that was prizing the yam ran faster than a bullet even more than me before I will look back every body clear both the woman that was selling yam entered our compound and locked me outside I just hid under the woman's table that was selling bread. I looked up,a man came back and was standing his head was so shiny and was reflecting the 🌞
He stood there and the military man came back angry that he missed his target he asked the man standing I told you to catch that boy why didn't you before the guy could reply a thunderous slap was heard poooa 👋👋he staggered and sat on the floor looking left and right as if he was deaf.people had to come out and begged the military man.the man left and every body came out of hiding and was consoling the man I came out of my hiding place and was walking home the woman that was selling yam beckon to "bros abeg help me put am for my head .due to what happened I forgot the woman locked me outside my own compound.and helped her😂😂😂😂

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The Palmer match

The Palmer match
My friends and I went to the betting center to charge our gadgets and phones. It was a big day - Chelsea was playing Everton! I'm not a big fan of football but arriving there for a different purpose required I stick around till the game is over.

As we watched, Chelsea scored goal after goal. The room was heated! When Palmer scored the third goal, the room erupted in cheers. Everyone was jumping up and down, celebrating. But then, something strange caught my eye. I saw a guy floating in the air! At first, I thought I was seeing things. But when I looked closer, I realized what was happening.

The guy had asked a taller friend to lift him up so he could reach a charging socket! It was hilarious. The tall guy was holding him up, and the other guy was stretching to reach the socket. Everyone was too busy celebrating to notice what was going on. But I couldn't help but laugh at the sight. It was such a silly thing to do!

The two guys were taking advantage of the distraction to charge their phones. I may have been the only one to spot that short-lived moment while the room went wild

In the end, Chelsea won the game, and we all left the betting center with big smiles on our faces. It was a day I'll never forget - and not just because of the game!

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The great Match

On a sunny day at the animal farm, a bustling gathering of creatures took place by the ocean's edge. The air was electric with excitement as animals from far and wide came to witness a historic encounter. The mighty elephant, renowned for its strength and wisdom, stood face to face with the majestic blue-green whale, celebrated for its enormity and aquatic prowess.

The two giants engaged in a boisterous meeting, their voices echoing across the landscape. The elephant, with its trunk held high, proclaimed, "I am the master of the land, and none can match my strength!" The whale, its fin slicing the air, retorted, "But I rule the seas, and my power is unmatched!"

The debate raged on, with neither side willing to yield. Finally, they agreed to settle the dispute with a challenge: a battle of strength and wit. The farm animals cheered and chattered, eager to witness the spectacle.

The day of the challenge arrived, and the farm was abuzz with anticipation. The elephant, with a confident stride, approached the ocean's edge. The whale, its massive body breaching the surface, swam closer to the shore. The two opponents faced each other, their eyes locked in a fierce stare.

The whale, with a sly smile, declared, "If you want to prove your strength, elephant, you must come into my domain – the sea!" The elephant, unfazed, replied, "Very well, but if you want to prove yours, whale, you must come onto my turf – the land!"

The crowd gasped in disbelief. How could an elephant survive in the water, and how could a whale move on land? The two opponents, however, were determined to prove their prowess.

With a mighty roar, the elephant charged into the ocean, its massive body creating a huge splash. The whale, with a graceful glide, swam towards the shore, its fins slapping the water. The two giants clashed in the shallow waters, their strength and agility on full display.

The battle raged on, with the elephant using its trunk to spray water and the whale using its tail to create powerful waves. The farm animals watched in awe, cheering and chanting for their favorite contender.

As the fight continued, it became clear that neither the elephant nor the whale could gain the upper hand. They were evenly matched, their strength and cunning perfectly balanced. Just when it seemed that the battle would never end, the two opponents suddenly stopped, looked at each other, and burst out laughing.

The farm animals cheered and applauded, realizing that the true victory was not in winning or losing, but in the friendship and respect that the elephant and the whale had developed. From that day forward, the two giants roamed the land and sea together, exploring new horizons and proving that even the most unlikely of friends could become the closest of companions.

The animal farm celebrated the newfound friendship with feasts and festivities, and the legend of the elephant and the blue-green whale lived on, inspiring generations to come.

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HOW I WENT TO WORK ONE MORNING 😂😂😂😂

I was trekking to work very early this morning holding 100naira with my face looking like bread wey them squeeze.

I tried looking for bus to take me to work but all of them were charging 150 due to the hike in fuel and 100naira was all I had if you combine my opay, palmpay, access bank, phantom wallet, telegram wallet and okx wallet. I no even get wetin to use chop.

While i was trekking, one little boy walked up to me in tears with serious catarrh coming out from his nose...

The boy: good morning sir. Sir please help me, I haven't eaten for the past 2days and nobody wants to help me.

I looked at the boy and the big quantity of catarrh coming out from his nose, I had compassion on him...

Me: you get 50naira, make I give you 100naira.

The boy: yes sir.

(he brought out small bundle of money from his pocket enough to feed me for 3days. He selected 50naira...)

The boy: stretched his hand sir look at it.

Me: snatched the 50naira and started running

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Laugh out loud 😂😂😂

Laugh out ur sorrow! 😂😂

1.You came back from school
tired and hungry,,You walked straight to the kitchen after dropping your bag.
On opening the soup pot,it was your
Worst soup that was
prepared,you Decided to manage it since you were hungry.
You opened the /Eba plate and discovered there's no Made Eba inside,,you decided to plug water since there was light,
After pluging it you went inside your room to relax and also wait for the water to boil.
Some minutes later,you went back to the kitchen to check the water but you noticed you didn't switch on the Socket, so you turned it On,
After switching it on, Nepa took the light,. You decided to use the Stove but unfortunately there was no Kerosene inside it. You went to neighbour's house buh dey are not around..
You trekked to your friend's house in the fourth street under the sun.
You boiled water there and pour it
in the flask uu took there.
You then took bike with your last
cash to your house on getting home you brought out a bowl and turning stick to prepare the eba ....
.
You then discovered there is no
garri in the house
. You now be like.....
(Eli,! Eli,!! Lama saba tani) ( My
God,My God, why has thou Forsaken
me)...with tears
in your eyes. That's when u'll na start beating your junior sis for not washing plate😂😂😂😂😂😂

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Green Stranger

Green Stranger
In one cool evening, I heard a manly scream and frantic footsteps. Curiosity kicked in, I dashed out from my house, keen to discover the cause of the commotion that had disrupted the evening calm.

To my surprise, I found a grown-up teen standing a few meters away from his room, frantically pointing towards the door. As I approached, he began to narrate how he had been peacefully attending to something in his room when, out of nowhere, a snake had chased a lizard right into his personal space. Gripped by fear, he had let out a piercing scream and hastily fled the room, seeking refuge outside.

Though I couldn't help but smile at his jittery reaction, I realized the situation was no laughing matter. I hurriedly called my brother for assistance, understanding that a snake in the house was not something to be taken lightly. As a girl, I had little knowledge of dealing with such creatures, and I knew my brother would be better equipped to handle the situation.

Armed with a sturdy stick, my brother arrived on the scene, ready to confront the unwelcome intruder. Cautiously, he managed to locate the snake, quickly identifying it as a green snake. With a swift and sporadic strike, he skillfully neutralized the reptilian threat, ensuring the safety and peace of mind of our distraught neighbor.

Even as the snake was removed, the neighbour continued to look scared and unsettled. He was afraid of his own room. He dragged his feet to his door steep and peeked in. To what seemed like he heard a sound, he ran.
I couldn't help it then that to rupture with laughter which I had suppressed from the onset.

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A DIGITALIZE WORLD

Good morning great educators in the building.........it's weekend splash

As a class room teacher have you experienced this?

(Phone ringing............) Mummy Shalom calling

Auntie Sharon; Hello ma! How is the family ma and my daughter?

Mummy Shalom; Don't greet me at all......... Did you run away from the class room then when is mathematics lesson period? Ahhba!!!!

Auntie Sharon: No ma.

Mummy Shalom: It's a lie you do during your school days. If not you won't calculate rubbish on my daughters' report sheet.

Auntie Sharon: Please don't be offended ma, it's the calculator I used is at fault.

Mummy Shalom: See you, calculator! Where schools are using Electronic Report sheet this days, if your school cannot subscribe to school software system management, they can afford the automated master sheet now, very cheap, accurate, safe stress and error free. Order for one now.

Pchat for more info.

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if Any one had told me I’d be a driver 👀👀

Last year, if anyone had told me that I’d be a driver, I would have laughed at them

But look at me now, this is my 5th month as a lawyer in the morning and bolt driver at night

Economy choke so I had to put my Corolla to good use and everything was running smoothly

Nobody knew except my wife and my mechanic until one day my neighbor, Amarachi, who I don’t even talk to, ordered a ride and satan chose me!

I said satan cos God cannot forsake his children.

I usually don’t check names and even if I had, I wouldn’t have known it was her cos we’re not even close and her flat is the building opposite mine. I’m in No 34B and she’s in 36A.

I accepted cos the destination was actually my bus stop. I was excited when I saw the request as I just turned on the app after work.

I drove to the location and when I got there I called the number displayed on the app.

The voice was beautiful, so I waited and a few minutes later I saw Amarachi. The worst thing was that she came out with my own next door neighbor in 34B, Charles.

They both strolled out of the club and before I could escape and zoom off, Charles recognized my car and screamed my name

“Kings, Howfr, you too come club?”

Before I could reply, I saw Amarachi checking my car plate number and double checking her phone

“You know my Bolt driver?” She asked Charles

God pun!sh you there. I said in my mind. As if she hasn’t seen this car before on our street.

“Bolt driver?” Charles asked in confusion

Shame almost ki||ed me

I just smiled nervously and asked them to come in. They haven’t even sat the stup!d girl asked me to turn on the AC and reduce the music

I imagined different ways to off them on the drive home but my Christian upbringing wouldn’t allow me, so we sat quietly till we got to our gate

Charles wanted to pay but I told him not to worry that I usually do it to help people, not like I needed the money.

“My guy!” Charles hailed me. “You know what, you go carry me and my babe again this weekend go Lekki” he mentioned the club then he gave me bottle water and soft drink he bought along the way

Babe ke? So, Charles is already dating Amarachi. I smiled as I nodded and wished him dea+h in my mind. Carry you again, as your driver? Bascard!

I decided to make one more trip cos I needed money for fuel the next day since I just carried bad market. Luckily, as I ended their trip, I got another request.

I quickly checked the name before I’ll carry my landlord next or our security and his babe cos these days everybody dey order ride

It was a female. I called and she confirmed her location

I got there and waited for almost 15 mins. I was already fuming and couldn’t wait to lash out until I saw her

She was the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen in Lagos!

Immediately, I offered her water or drink the one Charles dashed me

She was like huh, and looked at me suspiciously

I smiled and explained that I’m a rider with a difference, and my customers satisfaction is of utmost importance and priority and that’s why I always offer refreshments.

She smiled & confirmed that they were sealed, then next thing, she asked if she can have both cos she’s very thirsty & had a long day

Hmmmm… well, fine girl like this can never go wrong. So I gave her both drinks

She then said I should pls turn on the AC for her. Quickly I did even though I didn’t have much fuel

After staring at her from the side mirror severally, I decided to shoot my shot carefully. As a sharp guy, I started making small talks just to build courage and connection to request for her number

Soon, I asked if she wanted sweets then I brought out a pack and asked her to take a few

She thanked me and carried everything

After recovering from the shock, she now asked for my name

Happily, I told her my name.

She asked if this is my full time job

I said not at all. I’m a lawyer but I get bored when I close early from work after winning cases, so, I just use this side hustle to whirl away time and help people.

She smiled

I asked her if she’s going home or branching somewhere

She said, yes, she’s going home cos she’s done branching for the day

“So soon? Isn’t it too early for you to retire especially on a weekend?” I replied

Next thing, this babe asked me if I have somewhere in mind I want to take her to

I almost choked from excitement. Quickly, I said yeah. I was already thinking of the club in Lekki, Charles wanted to take Amarachi to so I told her.

She smiled and said okay she likes the sound of that… Just then her phone rang

She picked snd immediately started hurling insults on the phone

“Ordinary wig of 750k. 750k o, not even the 1.5 million naira own I asked for, and you ghosted me for 2 days, Femi. Anyway, a man like you got it for me… no wait, my bad. Not like you, a man better, far better than you!

I looked at her from my rear view mirror. Did I just hear her call 750k ordinary, and is it really 1.5M that is on her head like this?

“Look, my time, my body, even my shadow cost something. And so, if you’ve been giving me monthly allowance of 500k should I fly. Your mates do more” she barked

Next thing, she laughed a long laugh and said, “What I bring to the table? Look here darling, I am the table!” Then she hissed the longest I’ve ever heard and hung up

She switched immediately, and smiling, she asked me. “So, Kings, what were you saying, can we continue the conversation?”

I kept mute

“Hello, Kings, did you hear me?”

“Pls ma I don’t talk when driving.” I replied coldly

“Did you just call me ma?” She asked confused

I kept mute

“Never mind. So the club, hope it’s five star and the ambience is bougie cos I’m famished and also need a strong drink to wash off this toxic mood I’m in now.

“Club ke? Please ma, I’m a married man.” I brought out my ring from the glove box and wore it. “Don’t worry ma, we’re close to your house. You can eat and drink when you get home.”

She was quiet for a long time then hissed the second longest hiss I’ve heard and said,

“Men eh, men are really the s

“Thank you ma. Pls we’re here. Transfer or cash?”

The End

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Perfect Plan

Perfect Plan
In the grasshopper kingdom, there was a big meeting. All the grasshoppers gathered in a big field to discuss something important. They wanted to find a way to gather enough food to last them until the next season.

One of the older and wiser grasshoppers stood on a tall flower and called for everyone's attention. "We need to come up with a plan to get plenty of food," the wise grasshopper said. "The humans have a lot of crops, and we need to make sure we can hop high and sneakily to get to the yummy plants before they do."

All the younger grasshoppers listened intently as the plan was discussed. They talked about how to jump really high and fast so the humans wouldn't see them. They also chattered about how to work together to gather as much food as possible. Some suggested hopping in a certain pattern, while others thought of ways to distract the humans.

After a lot of hopping and chattering, the grasshoppers finally came up with a plan. "We will start our big gathering in July!" one of the grasshoppers exclaimed. "It's the perfect time to begin our mission to get all the delicious food for ourselves."

Excited and motivated, the grasshoppers nodded in agreement. They were ready for their adventure to begin. The grasshoppers huddled together, counting down the days until July. It was going to be an exciting and daring journey for the grasshopper kingdom.

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Love for food

Love for food
Chika was a bottomless pit when it came to eating. Wherever he went, if there was food, he was there, salivating like a hungry puppy. His love for food was unmatched, and it seemed like his stomach had no limit.

One fateful day, Chika had an important presentation at school. It was early in the morning, and his father advised him to have a simple breakfast like tea and bread, just like everyone else. But Chika had other plans. He believed that a heavy meal would keep him strong and focused, so he decided to go all out.

Ignoring his father's advice, Chika pulled out a stash of fufu and okro from his bag. He smacked his lips and dug in with gusto, not caring about the consequences. Little did he know that the thick, slippery soup was being sprinkled all over his crisp white shirt.

Unbeknownst to Chika, disaster was looming. As he stood before the school authorities and students, ready to deliver his presentation, the crowd burst into laughter. Confused, Chika looked down and saw the evidence of his food frenzy plastered all over his shirt.

Embarrassment flooded his face, and his heart sank. How could he have been so oblivious to the mess he had made? But even in his distress, he couldn't help but chuckle along with the raucous laughter of the audience.

The situation was ridiculous, and the absurdity of it all struck Chika in the funniest way. Despite the humiliation, he couldn't help but find the humor in the fact that his love for food had caused such chaos. And as he stood there, covered in soup, he realized that sometimes, laughter is the best way to cope with life's little unexpected incidents, so he let out a chuckle himself.

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Fake watch 😂😂

I was at a bus stop this evening when I saw a very pretty lady
Men, this babe fine die
See the way men dey Trip for her,
guys see the way I dey look this babe like say she be angel.
Suddenly I heard a sweet voice
"Hey you, what's the time please?"
I hardly believed I was the one she is talking to,
Now all eyes on me.
Proudly I looked at my wristwatch, it was then I realised my wristwatch was no longer working, and it stopped working early that morning…
Chai, see me oo, Heats flows through my spine.
"What's the time please??" She asked again.
I just have to say something
"Mmmm, well, it's just that I forgot to set my wristwatch" wait let me check my phone, and to make the matter worse my phone don off📴 Chei!! Who I offend??
Shey if you see the kind disgusting look this babe gave me ehn, I come weak, I dey speechless
Na so one yeye gal way dey back come whisper to her friend
"Na so dem go dey wear wristwatch wey no dey work up and down dey form dirty big boy" and to Make the matter worst, one fat woman wey dey for front come reply "No mind dem, some go even carry big phone wey no dey work dey do big boy, big boy empty pocket"
See shame, everybody for the bus burst out of laughter and to even make the matter worst, the girl wey ask me time follow dem dey laugh
See as shame catch me oo
To even make the matter worst, conductor wan ask me for money come say "Big boy bring your money" chei!!! Another round of laughter, this one even the driver sef follow laugh 😂😂😂
The funniest part is that the person reading this is also laughing too 😔

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Students Proposal

SSS1 STUDENT PROPOSE TO HIS ENGLISH TEACHER

It was a very big surprise to the entire school as SSS1 student decided to propose to his attractive English teacher.

During a class assignment, he slipped a love letter in the page of his assignment exercise book.

He had already informed his friends of the act. Everyone was waiting for the reaction of their teacher.

At home, while working on the students' assignments, she saw the letter which she also read.

The next day, at school, she shared the exercises to the students.

The boy got 17/20. But she didn't give him his copy. She simply ordered him to follow her to the teachers' room.

All his friends concluded that it was over for him because the disciplinary council would be waiting for him.

The most surprising thing was that when they arrived at the teachers' room, the teacher......
Chia, my data has finished, to read the full story, please send me money to buy data ooo, .
😛😛

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Over seriousness

Over seriousness
Some days ago, I decided to head back to my university after spending a relaxing night at a place close to the campus. The sun hadn't yet risen as I set out on my way, and I loved the peace of the early morning.

As I approached the university gates, I was met with a strangely empty campus. Where were all the students? Had I missed some kind of announcement? It seemed unreal that no one was around, especially on a weekday during the second week of the semester.

It slowly dawned on me, it was actually Sunday! I had somehow mixed up the days and come back a day early. This ridiculous realization made me chuckle. There I was, ready to dive back into the world of academia, while the rest of the student body was enjoying a well-deserved day off. If only I had checked the calendar more carefully.

For a brief moment, I considered simply heading back to my temporary abode and enjoying another day of home-cooked meals and relaxation. The thought of returning to the comfort of home was tempting, but I knew I couldn't procrastinate the inevitable return to my studies for much longer. After a good laugh at my own expense, I turned around and decided to make the best of my return a day early.

As I strolled back to my temporary dwelling, chuckling at my own confusion, I promised myself that I would pay more attention to the calendar next time. After all, it wouldn't do to continue to mix up the days and miss out on the opportunity to savor those home-cooked goodies for a while longer.

Who should I blame?, it was over seriousness that caused it.

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Fighting with a coconut

Fighting with a coconut
One sunny day, my mom challenged me to break a freshly plucked coconut from our tree.
It wasn't that a big deal to break a coconut, I thought . I placed the round shape on a surface and then I realized that there was more to a coconut.

As a girl, it seemed like an impossible task. I struggled and even resorted to watching YouTube tutorials on breaking coconuts, but to no avail. Finally, in frustration, I grabbed a machete and hacked it open.
No be me go die on top say I wan remove the back, that fibre part.

But the laugh was not over yet. I realized that I now had to extract the edible parts. Coconut might not be an elephant, but I sure felt like I was wrestling with one! After an epic battle, I triumphantly retrieved the precious flesh, feeling like I had conquered a legendary beast.

The coconut was finally vanquished, and I couldn't help but chuckle at the absurdity of it all. Mom's innocent setup had turned into a memorable showdown, and all for a simple coconut. Thank goodness it wasn't an elephant - I might still be there wrestling with it!

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It′s Funny with Mother

It′s Funny with Mother
And so, there I was, standing at the kitchen sink, diligently washing the dishes while also helping my mother with other kitchen chores. The warm water and soapy suds made a satisfying combination as I scrubbed away the remnants of our family dinner. My mother, busy with her own tasks, suddenly launched into a story that had me laughing so hard I almost dropped a plate.

She began recounting a hilarious incident from a few months ago in our village. It was a time when the in-laws and people from the groom's hometown had come to marry one of our village indigenes. Things took a hilarious turn when it became clear that they hadn't provided the required amount of drinks for the youths. This lack of hospitality provoked the village youths, who took it upon themselves to complain to the in-laws and the groom's people - but they paid no attention and acted stubborn.

In response, the village youths left the marriage ceremony and decided to take matters into their own hands. They made a blockade on the only road leading into the village and, to add to the drama, some of them dressed up in masquerade costumes. Anyone from the groom's people who was spotted by the makeshift guard was swiftly and comically flogged. To add to the amusement, they demanded a fine of 1000 Naira before allowing anyone to leave the village!

I almost threw myself on the floor to laugh to my fill as I imagined the whole scene play out in my head.
It was supposed to be a celebration, I asked my mother, why then did your people make it violent?..

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THE CRUEL

THE CRUEL
Once upon a time, in a small village, there was a young girl named Akua. She lived with her cruel and abusive stepmother, who made her do all the household chores and treated her like a slave. Akua's father, a kind and gentle man, had passed away when she was just a child, and her stepmother had married him for his wealth and property.

Akua's life was a nightmare. She was constantly beaten, starved, and belittled by her stepmother. Despite her hardships, Akua was a bright and curious girl who longed to go to school and make a better life for herself.

One day, Akua's stepmother went too far, and Akua was left with no choice but to run away from home. With a small bag of clothes and a few coins, she set out into the unknown, determined to make a new life for herself.

As she traveled to the city, Akua faced many dangers and challenges. She had to beg for food and sleep on the streets, all while avoiding the clutches of her stepmother, who was determined to find her and drag her back home.

But Akua was resilient and resourceful. She soon found work as a maid in a wealthy household, where she was treated with kindness and respect. She also began attending night school, where she excelled in her studies and discovered a passion for science and mathematics.

Years went by, and Akua's hard work and determination paid off. She earned a scholarship to a prestigious university, where she studied engineering and became one of the top students in her class.

Meanwhile, Akua's stepmother had been searching for her everywhere, but Akua had changed her name and kept a low profile, always staying one step ahead of her tormentor.

Finally, the day came when Akua graduated at the top of her class and landed a high-paying job at a top engineering firm. She was hailed as a rising star in her field and became a role model for young girls everywhere.

But just as Akua was about to start her new life, her stepmother appeared out of nowhere, demanding that Akua come back home and take care of her. Akua, now a confident and successful woman, stood up to her stepmother and refused to go back.

In a dramatic confrontation, Akua revealed her true identity and exposed her stepmother's cruelty and abuse to the world. Her stepmother was arrested and brought to justice, and Akua was finally free to live her life in peace and happiness.

And so, Akua's story became a legend, inspiring countless young girls and women to stand up against abuse and oppression, and to never give up on their dreams, no matter how impossible they may seem.


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Change your vision

Once there was a very wealthy man who was suffering from severe eye pain.He consulted many doctors and try their treatment but nothing helped.Even after consuming so many drugs to fix his eyes he still suffered from pain and that and that pain in eye persisted more than before.

At last,he heard about a monk who was famous for being an expert in treating such problems.He went to him and told him about his problem

Monk understood his problem and said that, "You should concentrate only on green colors and try not to let your eyes fall on any other colors. "
Man finds this prescription strange but he was despirate to find cure and decided to try it.
Wealthy man called for group of painters and purchased loads of green paint and directed that every object his eye was likely to fall to be painted green just as the monk had directed.

Just in few days everything around that man was in green. Wealthy man made sure that nothing around would in any other color.

After some days, monk came to visit wealthy man, millionaire servant ran with bucket of green paint and poured it all over him.

Monk asked servants reason for this. Servant replied, “You were wearing saffron and we can’t let our master see any other color than green..”

Hearing this monk laughed and said, “If only.. you had purchased a pair of green colored glasses for him to wear.. worth just few dollars..
You could have saved all these walls, articles and also would have been able to save a large amount of his fortune.. You cannot paint the world green.”


Moral:
It is foolish to shape/ Change the world, Let’s Shape ourselves first.. Let us change our vision and the world will appear accordingly


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Savage reply

I was in the sitting room in my house. My younger sister was sleeping, my younger brother, mom and I were watching movies.

My brother wasn't facing the door when the door opened and he asked me who went out and I said the devil 🤣🤣🙄.
Because who else was at home🤷‍♂️

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The drunk

The drunk
A drunk stammers out of a bar and runs into two priests. He runs up to them and says, 'I'm Jesus Christ.' The first priest says, 'No, son, I'm Jesus Christ.' So the drunk says it to the second priest. The second priest replies, 'No, son, I'm Jesus Christ.' The drunk says, 'Look, I can prove it.' and walks back into the bar with the priests. The bartender takes on look at the drunk and exclaims, 'Jesus Christ, you're here again?

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@angeltalented
angeltalented✓☆ 🏆32 🌟68Angel Chidiebube Mbaoma
2mo 21d

Oh poor roaches

Oh poor roaches
I used to be absolutely petrified of cockroaches. The mere sight of them would send shivers down my spine, and I'd do everything in my power to avoid them. So, you can imagine my horror when, during a day of packing and organizing, a cockroach suddenly darted out and started scampering up the wall. Without a second thought, I sprang back from the door, letting out an involuntary yelp of surprise. It must have been a comical sight to anyone observing.

I cautiously waited, my eyes fixed on the cockroach as it effortlessly scaled the wall and attempted to sneak beneath the packed shelves. I simply couldn't bear the idea of a cockroach inhabiting the same space as my beloved books. With a sense of determination mixed with disgust, I grabbed my trusty can of insecticide.

Summoning up all my courage, I took aim and targeted the intruder. The spray hissed out, and the vile pest tumbled down. But determined and resilient, it rose again, undeterred by my attack. Disgusted, I unleashed another volley of insecticide, relentless until the roach finally succumbed and remained motionless.

In that moment, I felt a strange mix of triumph and revulsion, while also being incredibly relieved. The battle was won, and I could pack my books in peace, secure in the knowledge that no uninvited guests would be sharing their space. From that day forward, I always made sure to have that bug spray ready at all times!

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Laid waste to Crops

Laid waste to Crops
back in primary school, I had an intense passion for action movies. I was captivated by the heroic feats of actors like Jack Chan, Jet Li, and James Bond, and I yearned to emulate their daring exploits. To me, action films were not just a form of entertainment but a depiction of real-life heroics, even at my tender age.

One day, fueled by my fervor for these movies, I took it upon myself to bring the action to life. I ventured into the woods and fashioned a makeshift sword from a sturdy branch, envisioning myself as a fearless warrior. With my sword in hand, I stealthily made my way into a neighboring farm, where I proceeded to engage in my own version of sword mastery, slashing and swishing through the air.

However, my exhilarating adventure came to an abrupt end when the owner of the farm discovered the devastation I had wrought upon the crops. Understandably, the neighbor was not pleased with my actions, and I was promptly confronted with the consequences of my reckless imitation of action movie stunts.

After some several strokes from my dad, I learnt my lessons. But one this was unforgettable. That moment in the farm was refreshing, filled with authority and power, nothing dared stood against me, any crop that did, I cut them down.

Didnt try approching any farmland from then, I only practices my sword skills with the air and waited for the day villains will show up.

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